Hello, I am the ‘potty minister!’

diaperYes, I am!

Read further at your own risk!

Before you twitch your nose in disgust and tag me crazy, let me tell you my story.

Once upon a time, I had a well paying job. A job that was good enough to pay my bills, allowed me to have some fun over the weekend and of course shopping when my heart desired. I was the Boss, (Though, I never let my team address me like that, but trust me, it feels good!) which meant I could pick and choose what I loved to do and delegate (force it on them & make them slog) the rest of the work to my team. Well, that’s how managers work. Isn’t it? (O.K – that was a bit of exaggeration, managers ain’t that bad.) Actually, we made a great team.

From dressing up perfect from top to toe (The world indeed looked beautiful from the top of my 5 inch heels) to hopping in and out of meetings, where we took some earth-shattering decisions – everything was going fine until one day.

The day when mommy-hood happened to me. No, H wasn’t a baby-by-chance. We very much planned our family keeping in mind all the factors – physical, financial, mental, emotional et al. I love her and I love to play mommy to her from dawn till dusk. Yes, even if it means saying bye bye to my dear office days. No, I haven’t quit my job yet. Perhaps, it would be too good of me to say that nothing changed. Life did change. Now, I have a new BOSS not just at office but at home too. I am supposed to be at her beck and call 24X7. Late night movies are swapped by bed time stories and weekend fun now means pushing the pram with one hand through the mall (the other hand is perpetually busy holding biscuit / toy/ sipper/ bib / diaper, according to the situation). Did you say shopping? Well, 80% of my shopping in last ten months has been from Mothercare, Mom & Me, Me & Mom and all those similar sounding baby stores. Did I mention those online stores?

Still, I am a happy mommy in her happy place. I had never thought that shopping for someone else would bring so much of joy to me. I think that’s what mommyhood does to you. I had prepared my self for some of this. Did I?

But there was one thing that I had never imagined myself doing religiously, without a miss. Not even in my weirdest of dreams I had ever imagined that I would have no qualms inspecting a diaper rather a soiled diaper every single day after H came into my life.

It began as an inquisitive check after H passed black poop during the initial days. And then came the concerned check when the poop changed from black to green. Doc said it was normal. Soon, H was constipated and I looked into that diaper again to find that hard pellet like poop. The girl was in pain and I was in tears. Wanted to help her somehow but to no avail. All I could do was increase her water content, change the milk formula and see the effect in the diaper day after day. Some day it was like cement and on others greasy. Semi solid on one and watery on the other. Can you imagine I had khushi ke aansu (tears of joy), the day H had normal looking poop in her diaper! Only a mommy would understand my joy.

Now, H had started her journey into the world of solids and with that began my new adventure into the world of poop. They say you have to check for food allergies when you introduce any new food into your child’s diet. So, besides looking out for other visible signs of allergy, peeping into her diaper became my daily routine. Associating colours and textures with what H had eaten a day before was my pass-time. Thankfully, H doesn’t have a food allergy but only constipation is what we have to regularly fight with. Gawd! I can write a feature on what food-item can lead to what kinda poop. Sounds yuck, but for a mommy, this is normal. Isn’t it? My husband calls me ‘Potty Minister,’ you might call me ‘potty-obsessed’ but I call my self ‘baby-obsessed.’

P.S: Sorry for spoiling your day with so much of poop-gyaan. I had warned you!


3 thoughts on “Hello, I am the ‘potty minister!’

  1. Hehe I couldn’t agree less with you… Poop observation became the norm for me as well… But Im proud of it cos I know my doll’s eating habits, what suits her n what doesn’t all thanks to this habit… And yeah I hav a toddler who jumps in joy every time I give her something to eat simply cos her mommy seems to know all tht she likes… Wont it fun when she grows up n Im gonna tell her about her Poop Scientist Mamma… Wonder how shes gonna react “Mamma Chiiiiiiiiiiiii….” heheeee…

    Liked by 1 person

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